Up down up…

I’ll be honest, yesterday, for one reason or another wasn’t a good day for me. Perhaps I was tired, and a bit sore from training week in the week… I just felt a bit shi!!y. I was down, but I recognised it early and didn’t push myself too much, I was kind to myself, took some time out and knew that better days would come.

Instead of pushing myself with a spin or strength workout in the morning, I did a half hour yoga session, did some work and went on a ‘dealing with uncertainty’ webinar later in the afternoon. All about recognising the impact uncertainty can have on you, and using the experiences and resources you already have to get through challenging times. I’ll add some notes from the session at the bottom.

This whole covid situation, winter, being stuck in, working from home, not being able to travel and some uncertainty for me is playing tricks on me a bit… but I’m putting in plans to make the future a better place for me, and if I’m honest with myself, I have things very good.

Yet I’m still choosing to harm myself a bit, by looking at the past, in the hope that something will come of it, but deep down I know it won’t. I’ll get no return, no matter how hard I try. So there’s likely no point in dredging it all up… even though I’ve just even trying to do what’s right – it seems there was no point. It’s hard to accept, but I’ve learned that it’s best to move on when things harm you.

So today I decided I would do things that give me energy – to start off with, a good hour in the gym – 20 mins strength (with Kyle – full body workout) and 30 mins spin (with Kym – two big hills with a flat road and intervals between them).

A good bit of movement and some good cardio and aerobic work on the bike – avg HR 146, max 167!

Before that I’d woken up at 1am… and rather than get up and stay up ruminating, I wrote down my thoughts quickly, and got back to bed and to sleep. These thoughts aren’t worth waking myself up, or staying awake for; and I’ve become better at being strict with myself so that my sleep isn’t stolen.

I know that exercise is the fix that helps me feel good, helps me get a good balance, so it’s important for me to do it. As does do social interaction, and a good amount of rest and sleep. (Even though it makes me look like the above 😂).

The garagym alone is something I’m very grateful we have… it’s enabling to get out exercise fixes, even in the middle of winter with freezing temperatures and inches of snow outside.

I have some good plans, which should see themselves through in the next 6-9 months or so. In the meantime, I’ll listen out for the days when I’m down, and I’ll not let myself go deep down. I’ll pick myself back up, reach out for chats, and relish in the good days.

Up down up down up… hopefully more ups are on their way, and I’ll get back to being more balanced overall with a bit more certainty around the corner.

Better times are on the way, it’s just they’re going to take a bit of time to get here, so I need to keep being patient and know that it’ll all come good some time soon. In the meantime, I need to get my positivity, happiness and confidence back.

Notes from the dealing with uncertainty webinar:

Be more present in the now
Don’t dwell on the past / focus on what you can do / what you can control
Control – internal external
Choose your response – to be strong
Managing emotions
Sense of purpose / destiny / purpose / role

Find sanctuary where we can find safety
Human brain to assess risk

Staying in touch with colleagues / friends / family
Use technology to connect and stay in touch
To be human with them
The team / family / friends are out there

Limit exposure to negative information
Not bombarded by too much negativity
Triple filter – True / good / help situation ?
Talk to others
Neutralise negativity

Positive – thinking about what I want
(Not what I don’t want or what won’t work / help)
Thoughts / feelings / actions = success

Understanding positive thinking and self talk
Use logic & reason
Generalise / distort / delete

Thinking style emotions and our health
Positive thinking chemicals – can help us to be mentally and physically healthy
Negative = stress / cortisol
Important to help us learn

Adopt positive thinking
Be flexible and learn to change your perspective
Motivate yourself towards the positive
Seek balance – performance & recovery
Mindset starts internally
Walking / thinking / talking

Use the weekends and evenings to recharge / re energise
Do fun stuff you enjoy
Be kind to yourself and take care of you and others

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