Following on from yesterday’s post, Everything is awesome? 2/5… here’s part three:
You realise that this isn’t right, and you need help. You need to find out what it all means. You start to overthink things, and diagnose yourself from information you find on the Internet. You try to understand what has triggered this. So you can get back to ‘normal’ – so you can get rid of this crazy.
You’re over analysing everything, and when you’re lying there trying to get to sleep, you’re getting worried and upset because you can’t sleep. Lying there – confused and upset, quietly, silently crying. Scared, lost and out of control – not knowing what to do to get better.
You reach out to those closest to you to ask for help. You open up and cry in their arms. You try to be logical, but your emotions are all over the place and you don’t know why. You feel broken, and you want to be fixed. You realise that everything isn’t so amazing after all.
You go to your GP and ask some relatives in your family who are medics for some help. You’re pointed in the right direction to get help. To help you understand what’s happening to you. Mania, or hypomania, or a manic episode. You get the help and information you need to recover.
You’re not diagnosed with any ‘condition’, and you’re cleared that you don’t need medication, but it’s clear you’ve not been very well. You’re relieved. You’re referred to talk to a community psychiatric nurse and get your thoughts back in order. You walk in the park, you relax, you slow everything down. You’re fixing yourself.
You realise you’re ok, you just need to get a balance and you’ll be alright. You try to learn what triggered it all, and try to avoid those things. Running fast, over training, pushing yourself and your body, it seemed to trigger it all. You talk, you write your way to health and recovery. You take care of yourself.
You learn how to help yourself, how to cope – how to get your health and wellbeing back. You realise you’ve been on a fast train without brakes, and the driver has gone missing. You climb into the driver’s cabin, and you learn how to put the brakes on.
You learn how important it is to get a balance, to relax, to do what you enjoy. You learn to lean on and speak to others close to you. Triggers, symptoms, coping strategies – you get to know them all.
You find out what works for you.
– – …. – –
or you can read the whole thing here: Everything is Awesome?